To be truly successful means to be truly peaceful and know how to return to a state of peace when disturbed.
The other day in my spinning class the instructor asked me, “why I was taking the class, and what my end goal was…” You may think I was going to say to lose weight, or to lose some calories… Well to her surprise I added that I was there to nurture my peace of mind… Yes, that is a way for me to focus on myself and let things go with my fiscal effort, letting the stress evaporate every second of the class. It may sound funny to all of you, but that is a way for me to build in my heart and soul peace, and calmness.
But what is peace of mind?
From Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia "Peace of Mind" may refer to: “The absence of mental stress or anxiety, and the presence of serenity, calm, quiet, comfort of mind; Inner peace”
So what is peace of mind for you? Let’s talk about it in this entry…
We tend to be an anxious society. In fact, we may be an anxious world because we worried about war, losing our jobs, dangers confronting things, fear of being parents, stress about working too much, insecurity and uncertainty. We tent to ask ourselves very frequent: “What if..?” and this worry is understandable given the state of things at the present time. However there is no doubt that with the right tools and support all of us can overcome stressful situations, and rise from any trouble in a stronger way. I’m sure all of us can live and fulfill life in the middle of the difficulties we may face. As I read sometime, “all of us can find a sense of peace and purpose”.
Now let’s explore some recommended tips to build awareness on how to achieve peace of mind. But before getting into this, please remember: “it is one step at a time, or one day at time to develop and master a skill”.
Step 1: Un-Set Our Heart…Un-setting our heart means letting go of our picture of how we want it all to be. It means letting go of trying to control things over which we have no control. One of the prime causes of our suffering is our wanting things to be different than they are. Yes, we all want a peaceful world instead of a world filled with weapons of mass destruction. Yes, we all want health instead of illness. Yes, we all want healthy, happy children instead of children who break our hearts. But sometimes life doesn't hand us what we want. And when we un-set our hearts from our needing it all to be a certain way, we can breathe a sigh of relief and open the door to a more powerful way of living.
Step 2: Create a Wondering Life Instead of a Hoping Life…It helps us un-set our hearts when we replace the words "I hope" with the words "I wonder." Let’s take a look how: Instead of "I hope this difficult situation ends quickly," make it "I wonder if this difficult situation will end quickly." Instead of "I hope the stock market goes up," make it "I wonder if the stock market will go up." Instead of "I hope I keep my job," make it "I wonder if I'll keep my job." Notice the relief in this simple shift. Even with difficult situations in our lives, substituting "I wonder" for "I hope" keeps our hopes from being dashed and opens up the possibility of our learning and growing from whatever happens.
Step 3: Choose the Path of Trust…When we fully understand that we have little control of the external world, we then have two choices: we can choose to see ourselves as a "poor-me" victim at the mercy of circumstances or we can choose to develop the trust that, no matter what happens in our life or in the world, we will have the inner strength to create something good from it all. Hopefully we will choose the latter! Remember every difficult moment is a learning experience.
Step 4: Increase Your Inner Sense of Power…One way to help us develop trust in ourselves is to cut off negativity in the mind by saying to ourselves over and over again, "Whatever happens in our lives, we’ll handle it! If we say it often enough, we will ultimately believe it. And if we really believe that we can handle anything that happens in our life and in the world, what could we possibly have to fear? Nothing!
So when the "what-if's" are driving us mad, simply cut them off by saying over and over again, "Whatever happens, We'll handle it!" We'll feel a sense of confidence wash over us. "What if I lose my job? I'll handle it." "What if my children have difficult times? I'll handle it. Whatever happens in my life, I'll handle it!"
Step 5: Focus of the Learning…This is my favorite! Yes, we can learn and find strength from anything that happens to us. I certainly learned from and found strength as a result of my own experiences with things I have faced in life. If we see ALL situations in life as a way of learning and growing, it helps us let go of our need for things to be a certain way.
Keep this in mind:
• War = a way of learning
• Peace = a way of learning
• Illness = a way of learning
• Health = a way of learning
• Poverty = a way of learning
• Wealth = a way of learning
• Depression = a way of learning
• Joy = a way of learning
Despite what is happening in our life and in the world, constantly let’s remind ourselves "
We can learn from this." When we can see the opportunities inherent in all situations, good or bad, it truly helps us embrace all the uncertainty in our life.
Lastly, I wanted to add this final suggestion…
As we go about our day, stop for a moment and notice when something wonderful happens. Then say to ourselves while still in the glory of the moment, "I have had this." This is the acknowledgment that "No matter what happens tomorrow, we have had this today." It is in the noticing of the little things that we truly get the feeling of a life well-lived... that wonderful hot shower, that kiss from a loved one, the fact that your car started, that great dinner you are eating, the warm rays of the sun, a candy bar, a warm smile, a nice thank you, a wonderful television show, a happy person at work, etc… That will help us achieve more awareness of “peace of mind” and it is not that complicated believe me!
If we, step by step, begin incorporating into our life these tips, our sense of peace of mind will grow and grow. Remember: there is plenty of time...but now is definitely the time to begin!
Action Item:
1. Think about the positive outcomes you may have when adding one of these steps in your daily life and routine.
2. Think about people in your own circle that can be a great role model for increasing your peace of mind.
3. Share with us your impressions, when incorporating these tips in to your life
Enjoy!
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